“Hell” is a bus ride

The co-ed seats

KUWAIT:   Today, I’d like to call myself a broken recorder.  Since time immemorial, I’ve been repeating my monologue on zany bus rides.  And for more than one hundred and one times I’ve been squishing myself inside these buses, it’s also more than a hundred and one times I’ve been praying that some brilliant inventor has already formulated the technology of tele-transportation, where I could just pop off in mid-air and get anywhere in a snap!  Take note – hell is a bus ride in Kuwait.

First stop: Ladies’ Seats.  What they probably mean is two, or at least two and a half, “ladies’ seats.”  More exactly, invisible “ladies’ seats.”  It’s actually hard to locate where exactly these so-called “ladies’ seats” are, especially when some men seem to pretend they are “ladies,” and blissfully steal away these seats.  Those stickers “For Ladies Only,” however creative they appear with drawings and all, are a waste of paper.  They should be removed as they only vandalize the bus without serving their real purpose.  Or else, changed into “Also Men’s Seat Sometimes When Desired.”

Outlawed law of inertia

Second stop: Load, Reload and Overload.  If there is one bus passenger who is difficult to tame, it could be the bus driver.  This reminds me of a message in an overpass in Hawally that states: “Your driving is symbol of your civilization.”  Huh?!?  I’m not sure exactly what that means but I suspect no bus driver understands it either.  No bus driver with a civilized mind would accommodate more dopes to an obviously bursting bus that everytime I’m riding one, I could almost sniff the forming of crystallized civilization inside the nose of the passenger standing in front of me.  The bus now resembles a matchbox where everyone could rub each other’s heads and set the bus on fire.  So civilization begins – and so does the discovery of fire.  We are all enflamed.  We may now burn the driver for not thinking that overloading may cause accidents.  The doors won’t function either.  And everyone may be thrown out anywhere in split seconds.  And the only way to get off is to slither through bodies of total strangers.  It is here when harassment to the left and harassment to the right take place.  In this case, I can precisely tell the difference between the sexes.  In an overcrowded bus, women are harassed and men are not.  

 

Third stop: Unfair Fare.  When the bus is overloaded, I’m reminded that the world is indeed unfair.  My 150 fils could have gone to worthwhile things like a newspaper.  But then, here I am, either half-seated or not seated at all, paying 150 fils but using only 5 fils from it.  I should have paid 25 fils for a quarter-seat or 75 fils for a half-seat.  150 fils may not sound much to some.  But when you sweat blood at work to earn and save at least a hundred and fifty fils in your pocket, these silver coins are heavier than gold coins.  And for those buses with “Ladies’ Seat” on a pedestal, I’d say it’s a waste of space.  That spacious elevation, if divided, is equivalent to four seats!  What are those platforms for?  Are they designed to elevate us women or for the male passengers to get a better view of us?

I think buses around here need a little make-over for convenience, like coming up with a more occupiable space for those standing.  I mean what’s the point of having big buses with small spaces to fill anyway?  Eventhough they cost cheaper than taxi fares doesn’t mean we, bus passengers, have to sacrifice our own convenience too.  If men get more benefits from bus rides then companies and employers should at least provide transportation for women, otherwise produce a separate bus for women.

 

As far as I could comprehend, when one means “Public Transport” it means public service.  And when you say “PUBLIC,” it means “ALL.”    (Published date October 23, 2007 entitled ‘Hell is a bus ride in Kuwait’; print; Kuwait Times)